What do you think of when someone says the phrase “self-care”?
Do you think of a warm bath? A good book? A fuzzy blanket? Hanging with your dog?
For me, I indulge in junk food. And it’s literally killing me.
My self-care has turn self-destructive.
The other day (Wednesday) I bought two large bags of chips and three jumbo Crunchie bars. That’s my M.O.
And I scarfed all the chocolate and one bag of chips down without a single thought of how much this was hurting me. I told my 16 y. o. to take that second bag of chips hidden in the closet and do away with them. Give them away. Just get them out of my sight.
Yesterday (Monday) I bought a single big bag of chips and a huge bag of milk-chocolate chips.
Continuing the cycle.
My 16 y.o. came home from school, eye-balled the empty chip bag and rolled his eyes at me. He asked why on earth I bought another bag of chips after having him remove the last bag.
And my answer way key. “I was depressed over not getting the job I interviewed for and I’m drowning my sorrows in food.”
Self-destructive food. It is the cause of my gaining 90 lbs when we moved from NS to Manitoba in 2004. And I’ve only lost 20 of them.
I am morbidly obese at this point.
So I’m sitting here wondering what I do next. I need to find some positive ways to take care of myself that don’t include food our large outlays of cash.
So I went hunting and found this profound list from Self-Love Circle to help. I’m putting it on my fridge and in my planner so I see it daily and use it to ensure my days of destroying my body are over.
I hope this can help you as well, if your self-destructive habits are weighing (pun intended) you down!